Home is Where the Heart Is...

A friend once said "You get tested through your loved ones". It got me thinking. We are surrounded by people we love and who love us. Their whims and temperaments surely, in one way or another, will affect us. Instead of just brushing these aside, we should examine how these can make us learn to be a better person.

Having difficult siblings or family members helps us build our patience and tolerance. We sometimes think it's better to just shove them aside and ignore. Instead, we go out and give attention to strangers. Sometimes we  may feel that helping or giving attention to others seems to be more worthwhile than helping out our own family, just like how a traditional Malay saying that says " You'd rather feed a monkey in the forest, while you child is dying of starvation at home". Dealing with hardship within the family is, but a test to us and its reward is totally intrinsic; unseen by others but only felt by the individual, only for God to judge.

Family should also be a place to start when intending to do charity (sadaqah). I read in a book that when one starts to consider about doing charity, he should look to see if anything is required first by his immediate family, before he reaches out to others. 

In a hadith,  the Prophet p.bu.h visited me at Mecca while I was ill. I said (to him), "I have property; May I bequeath all my property in Allah's Cause?" He said, "No." I said, "Half of it?" He said, "No." I said, "One third of it?" He said, "One-third (is alright), yet it is still too much, for you'd better leave your inheritors wealthy than leave them poor, begging of others. Whatever you spend will be considered a Sadaqa for you, even the mouthful of food you put in the mouth of your wife. Anyhow Allah may let you recover...." 

What ever we do and spend towards the family is sadaqah (charity). However, this charity  may not give us ample recognition from others, but it will certainly give us a sense of deep satisfaction and achievement, God Willing. And I feel that this charity does not only come in material form, but also time, attention and most importantly love. Still, before we can give to others, we have to look within us and see to our own needs- borrowing a quote from a friend, "True respect for another comes from self respect. True love for another comes from self love. True forgiveness for another comes from self forgiveness."

Yes, we are tested through our loved ones, but God's blessing also comes through our loved ones.

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Sheen Mars is a SAHM who is on a journey of continuous learning. She especially enjoys exploring and sharing her personal thoughts and opinions, as she reflects on her life as a SAHM. Discover more about Sheen's Thoughts at =>> http://missionpossible-sahm.blogspot.com/search/label/Sheen's%20Thoughts